This week I’ve been following the tragic case of Sandra Cantu, an eight-year old California girl who was raped and murdered. Her suspected killer is Melissa Huckaby, a local Sunday school teacher. Also this week, I learned that rapper Lil Wayne told Jimmy Kimmel that he first had sex at age 11. Kimmel termed it “lost your virginity,” but due to Wayne’s age at the time and the 13-year old girl who lured him with board games, I think the incident would be better categorized as rape.
Both the Wayne and Cantu cases stuck out to me because they really run against the stereotypical depictions of men as predators and women as victims. While statistically women commit only about 10% of murders, if Huckaby is guilty, it will be a sad case-in-point that women, even white, Sunday school-teaching mothers, can indeed rape and kill. Wayne’s childhood assault is completely deplorable—and so is the fact that Kimmel thought it was okay to joke about it on TV—and it’s a stark reminder that men are also victims of sexual violence. Even African American, bling-loving rappers who write hypersexual, misogynist songs like “Ask Them Hoes.”
I really wonder if Kimmel would have asked Britney Spears or Missy Elliot or any other female celebrity about losing their “virginity” before they turned 12. My feeling is, such an exchange would have had a lot more of “you’re a survivor” and a lot less of “wow, cool, what was that like?” What do you think? If Lil Wayne were a woman, would Kimmel even touch the subject?