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A DAY AT THE OFFICE….When I read that Merrill Lynch CEO John Thain had spent $1.2 million redecorating his office, my first thought wasn’t, “What a moron.” (That was second.) It was, “How can you spend that much on one room? Solid gold wall sconces? Ashtrays carved out of moon rocks? What?” Luckily for me, Charlie Gasparino has the answer:

The biggest piece of the spending spree: $800,000 to hire famed celebrity designer Michael Smith, who is currently redesigning the White House for the Obama family for just $100,000.

The other big ticket items Thain purchased include: $87,000 for an area rug in Thain’s conference room and another area rug for $44,000; a “mahogany pedestal table” for $25,000; a “19th Century Credenza” in Thain’s office for $68,000; a sofa for $15,000; four pairs of curtains for $28,000; a pair of guest chairs for $87,000; a “George IV Desk” for $18,000; six wall sconces for $2,700; six chairs in his private dining room for $37,000; a mirror in his private dining room for $5,000; a chandelier in the private dining room for $13,000; fabric for a “Roman Shade” for $11,000; a “custom coffee table” for $16,000; something called a “commode on legs” for $35,000; a “Regency Chairs” for $24,000; “40 yards of fabric for wall panels,” for $5,000 and a “parchment waste can” for $1,400.

Impressive! But it doesn’t add up to $1.2 million. It adds up to $1.3 million just for these 19 items alone, and there were probably plenty of smaller ticket nicknacks too. Plus labor — unless that’s included in Smith’s fee. Probably not, I suppose, which means this monument to American capitalism must have run at least a couple million bucks. The Sun King would have been proud.

And my third question? That’s easy: “Who leaked this?” Most probable answer: BofA chief Ken Lewis, the guy who fired Thain, in an effort to keep attention focused on his scapegoat of the hour. Good luck with that, Ken.

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